A second Cats trailer has dropped. The first advert appeared back in July, and people were mostly horrified ('demented dream ballet' is the description that really sticks in the memory). We're happy to announce that the second effort is another big ladleful of bonkers.
From what we've seen so far, Tom Hooper's reimagining of the phenomenally popular Andrew Lloyd Webber musical is all kinds of wrong, yet weirdly enthralling at the same time. We don't expect it to be joining our ranking of the best 3D movies any time soon.
When the Sonic movie trailer caused widespread complaints, Paramount bowed to popular pressure and completely redesigned the titular character. The makers of Cats would not be so easily intimidated. They are clearly sticking with their initial, delirious vision for this movie – despite a range of extremely odd CGI decisions (which we will explore later in this article). Take a look at the new Cats trailer below:
Still with us? Below is the original trailer. We wouldn't normally include both, but these are really quite special.
Now let's have a closer look at the four most bonkers CGI decisions from this wild feline fiesta.
01. The cats look like humans covered in fur
First up, let's decide what you're going for here. Realistic creatures conveying human emotions? That works – just look at the Lion King remake. Humans that give the impression of cats through stylised costumes and body movements? Another strong approach – go ahead.
But no. The film-makers here have opted for something between the two: super-realistic CGI cat fur (achieved using 'digital fur technology' nonetheless) paired with entirely human faces and human proportions, but (understandably) no accurate anatomical details.
Whoever decided this eerie hybrid of human and feline could be anything other than a one-way ticket to uncanny valley was sorely mistaken. We'll see you in our nightmares, Mr Mistoffelees.
02. No one can decide what size the cats are
By all means bend the rules of nature and ask the audience to suspend their disbelief, but if you're going to do that you at least need to be consistent. In the Cats stage show, the cats are human sized. Here, the technology is there to shrink them down to the scale of a natural cat. However, across the course of this two-and-a-half minute trailer the feline characters are variously the size of a piece of cutlery, roughly real-cat-sized, and entirely human-sized. It's all a bit distracting.
03. Only some cats wear clothes
How clothes work in this nightmarish alternate world is incredibly hard to fathom. Many of the cats, as you would expect of a cat, are naked but for the aforementioned realistic fur. However, others wear clothes, ranging from jackets to top hats. Judi Dench's gender-swapped Old Deuteronomy, already a fairly fluffy breed, sports a fur coat in the same colour as her fur. Where does this fur come from? Another cat? Let's not dwell on the logistics there too much.
04. Lady cats have cleavage
The last of our gripes is perhaps the most upsetting of all: there are a number of shots that suggest these kitties – the females in particular – are meant to be sexy. While the addition of animal ears or tails might float some people's boats, even Hefner would surely have been thrown by a furry Taylor Swift wearing heels. And absolutely no one wants to see a cat with cleavage.